


World Meeting Gone Wrong

by orphan_account



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Does this count as suspense?, I wrote this when I was jetlagged, Just your average day after a world meeting, Kinda Crackish, Not entirely chat it switches between chat and narrative, Please Don't Take This Seriously, Swearing so beware, There may or may not be magic involved, chatfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-03
Updated: 2020-01-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:41:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22087321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Confusion, hysteria, and a lack of proper communication. A recipe for disaster. Unless you have a working cell phone.
Comments: 5
Kudos: 41





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Jumping onto the chatfic bandwagon 100000 years too late. Enjoy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a bunch of bored nations in an old af estate at night. What could possibly go wrong?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> King of Scandinavia = Denmark  
> The Awesomer Beilschmidt = Prussia  
> Tomato Bastard = Spain

_Chat Room - Awesome Touch Brothers_

_Time - 9:53 PM_

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Bruh why the heck is Germany still talking I thought we were supposed to end at 8

 **The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** Wanna play Fortnite?

 **King of Scandinavia:** way ahead of you

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Nice

 **The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** Want me to wake up Toni and get him to join?

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Yeah go ahead

 **Arthur Kirkland:** I never understood the hype surrounding this game. It’s so childish and stupid.

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Diss Fortnite again and I’ll orange justice on your grave old man

 **Francis Bonnefoy:** LMAO take the L blockbrows!

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** …

 **Arthur Kirkland:**...

 **The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** Please never say that again

_Time - 9:59 PM_

**King of Scandinavia:** fuck whoever ThiccqueAss42069 is. that little bitch ruined my kill streak

 **The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** You know that’s Sealand, right?

 **King of Scandinavia:** how the hell did he manage to take out our entire team in 2 minutes hes like 6 years old

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Yo dudes wtf the game says I’m offline

 **Tomato Bastard** : It says that for me too.

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Why’s your name Tomato Bastard I thought it used to be your human name

 **Tomato Bastard:** Romano hacked my phone and I don’t know how to change it back.

The grandfather clock struck ten. The chimes echoed through the meeting room. At once, all of the lights shut off. There was a brief moment of screaming and panic. Then all was silent.

_Chat Room - World Meeting 5/12_

_Time - 10:00 PM_

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** WHY IS THE POWER OUT IT’S NOT EVEN RAINING I CAN’T SEE SHIT

 **Arthur Kirkland:** If you can’t see anything, then how are you typing this?

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT

 **Feliciano Vargas:** WHY CAN’T I HEAR ANYTHING WHERE IS EVERYONE

 **Feliciano Vargas:** GERMANY

 **Feliciano Vargas:** GERMANY

 **Feliciano Vargas:** GERMANY

 **Feliciano Vargas:** GERMANY

 **Ludwig Beilschmidt:** Please, just stay calm everyone! Don’t move and wait for the power to come back on!

 **Feliciano Vargas:** SOMETHING’S GRABBING MY ARM AND IT FEELS LIKE DEATH

 **Lovino Vargas:** IT’S ME IDIOTA I’VE BEEN HOLDING ONTO YOU THIS ENTIRE TIME HOW COULD YOU HAVE NOT SEEN ME

 **The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** WEST THE POWER’S NOT COMING BACK ON WHAT IF I LOSE YOU FOREVER I ALREADY LOST YOU ONCE I CAN’T LOSE YOU AGAIN

 **Feliciano Vargas:** What do you mean by “lose you again”?

 **Ludwig Beilschmidt:** Now is not the time to discuss that! Have a little patience and trust that everything will go back to normal!

 **Arthur Kirkland:** If all of you are on your cell phones, why can’t you just turn the flashlight on and find each other?

 **Feliciano Vargas:** I TRIED THAT ALREADY I CAN’T EVEN SEE FRATELLO AND HE’S STANDING RIGHT NEXT TO ME

 **Feliciano Vargas:** PLEASE DON’T MAKE ME COME BACK HERE FOR TOMORROW’S MEETING

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** WE’RE ALL GONNA DIIIIEEEEE

_Time - 10:05 PM_

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Oh wait the power’s back on

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** How tf did I get here

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Where are you guys

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Guys?


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shit's about to go down real soon.

Canada and America ended up on completely opposite sides of the manor. America was standing in the middle of a very long hall that leads to a library. Canada was less fortunate and ended up in a dark wine cellar.

_Chat Room - North American Bros_

_Time - 10:07 PM_

**Matthew Williams:** Alfred which room are you in?

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Oh thank god you’re alive Mattie

 **Matthew Williams:** Yes I’m glad I’m alive too, now tell me where you are.

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** I’m in the hallway

 **Matthew Williams:** Which one?

 **Alfred** **Freedom Jones:** The one leading to the library

 **Matthew Williams:** Gil told me he was in there. I’m nowhere near a library.

 **Alfred** **Freedom Jones:** Since when do you call Gilbert “Gil”

 **Alfred** **Freedom Jones:** Wait Mattie I think I hear voices coming from the library

 **Alfred** **Freedom Jones:** Gotta blast

 **Matthew Williams:** I’m in the wine cellar by the way, thanks for asking.

America pushed one of the mahogany doors open and found Prussia and Finland chatting at a table.

“Thank god, I thought I’d be the only one in this wing of the manor,” America said, relieved.

“Well, there were 30 something of us at the meeting; you’re bound to be here with someone,” Finland responded.

“So, y’all got a plan on how to get outta here?” America asked.

Finland shrugged. “We were just devising a strategy, and Prussia was trying to get information from Romania, since this estate did once belong to one of his former bosses.”

“Strategy,” Prussia scoffened. Finland shot him a glare.

“Did Romania reply?” America asked.

“Nope,” Prussia said. He threw his hands up in exasperation. “We’re fucked.”

“Don’t be so pessimistic! We all got some military tactician left in us, right?” Finland offered.

“Can’t remember the last time I won anything,” Prussia mumbled.

“That’s because you don’t have a military.”

“Shut it.”

America clapped his hands together. The two other nations turned from their squabble, realizing that they momentarily had forgotten America’s presence.

“I think y’all are onto something,” he said. “Strength in numbers hardly ever fail.”

“Easy for you to say, Mr. 3rd highest population in the world.” Prussia reverted back into his usual smirk. “So what’s the plan?”

_Chat Room - World Meeting 5/12_

_Time - 10:14 PM_

**Alfred** **Freedom Jones:** I got an idea guys

 **Arthur Kirkland:** Wow, that’s something you don’t hear everyday.

 **Alfred** **Freedom Jones:** Shut up Peppa Pig

 **Sealand is a country:** LMFAAOOOO ROASTED!!!!!!!!

 **Arthur Kirkland:** Who the hell invited you here I told you to stay home!

 **Sealand is a real country:** Suck my ass jerkwad I invited myself!!!

 **Alfred** **Freedom Jones:** Anyway I know most of y’all have working cellphones and are in this chat so I need everyone to send their location and the people they’re with

 **Arthur Kirkland:** Would it hurt to add commas?

 **Alfred** **Freedom Jones:** I’m with Gilbert and Finny in the library on the second floor

 **Ludwig Beilschmidt:** Denmark and I are in the attic.

 **Arthur Kirkland:** I am by myself in a guest bedroom. I don’t know which floor I’m on.

 **Norgay:** Hungary, China, and the Italians are with me in the kitchens

 **Honda Kiku:** Supein-san, Honkon-san, and I are wandering around the first floor.

 **Matthew Williams:** I’m alone in a wine cellar.

 **Sealand is a real country:** You’re in a wine cellar too? Geez how many wine cellars does this house have?

 **Arthur Kirkland:** You’re probably in the same cellar as him, you git!

 **Francis Bonnefoy:** Most of us have met up in the drawing room. It’s the first door you see when you reach the bottom of the basement stairs. You all should meet us there.

 **Alfred** **Freedom Jones:** Roger that, Captain Baguette

_Chat Room - Nordick Five_

_Time - 10:18 PM_

**King of Scandinavia:** ey waldie are you in the drawing room

 **Berwald O:** Yes.

 **King of Scandinavia:** sweet. is icey there too

 **Emil Steilsson:** Yep and so is nearly every Slavic and Baltic country

 **Emil Steilsson:** It’s like Russia installed a homing device or something in everyone who was formerly Communist

 **Berwald O:** He probably did.

 **Tino Vaïnamoïnen:** Gilbert accidentally took a wrong turn and now no one knows where to go. At least we found Antonio, Leon, and Kiku.

 **Berwald O:** Do you need me to go out and look for you?

 **Tino Vaïnamoïnen:** No no, I’ll be fine! Besides, I don’t want you to risk getting lost.

 **King of Scandinavia:** odins beard just get married already

_Time - 10:27 PM_

**Tino Vaïnamoïnen:** We found the basement!

 **Emil Steilsson:** About time

 **Norgay:** Good for you

 **King of Scandinavia:** norge, shouldnt you be there already the kitchens are on the first floor

 **Norgay:** We were on our way to the drawing room when Mario suddenly ran like the devil was on his ass

 **King of Scandinavia:** was the devil on his ass

 **Norgay:** I didn’t see anything so no

 **Emil Steilsson:** You still looking for him?

 **Norgay:** If we had found him then we would’ve been here six minutes ago

 **Emil Steilsson:** Why don’t you just sneak off and head for the basement yourself?

 **Norgay:** Luigi and Hungary wouldn’t let us go anywhere without finding Mario first.

 **Norgay:** And I’d rather not die at the hands of that woman

 **King of Scandinavia:** place your bets on who will reach the basement first, me or norge

 **Tino Vaïnamoïnen:** Mathias, because it’s practically impossible to catch an Italian.

 **Berwald O:** Dan.

 **Emil Steilsson:** I don’t want to have to say this but Den

 **Norgay:** Thanks guys, I truly appreciate the support

_Time - 10:34 PM_

**Tino Vaïnamoïnen:** Sorry Lukas, Mathias got here before you could.

 **Emil Steilsson:** Wait why are Hungary and China here I thought they were with him

 **King of Scandinavia:** what if mario was right and norge got attacked by the devil

 **Berwald O:** Don’t be stupid.

 **King of Scandinavia:** i asked china and he said something came after them and they got split up

 **Emil Steilsson:** Let me try something

 **Emil Steilsson:** If you come to the drawing room within two minutes I’ll call you big brother for the rest of my life

_Time - 10:36 PM_

**Emil Steilsson:** Okay he’s probably dead

_Time - 10:51 PM_

**Norgay:** Tell everyone that there is something else in this manor

 **Norgay:** I don’t know how dangerous it is

 **Norgay:** I’m hiding in a pantry by the way

 **Norgay:** Hey there’s butter cookies in here


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More characters. More trouble. And a lot more screaming. Humor ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lars V = Netherlands  
> ^J^ = Russia  
> Vlad the Prevailer = Romania

In the drawing room, Denmark stood on the pool table, Viking style, and relayed Norway’s message to the other nations. There were a lot of confused glances and most thought nothing of it. Not until China and Hungary confirmed that it was true.

Within seconds, the room erupted into chaos. Lots of “I don’t wanna die!” and “Wait! So and so is still out there!” were being thrown around.

Unable to handle all the noise and havoc, Germany pounded a fist on the table and yelled, “WOULD YOU ALL BE QUIET?!”

Everybody stopped talking at once.

Germany took a deep breath before beginning.

“We have to do a headcount of everyone if we intend to stay safe. Now please, look around, and if you do not see your neighbor or friend, raise your hand.”

Eleven hands shot up.

“France.”

“Belgium et Netherlands, as well as the Italys.”

Germany produced a notepad and scribbled down their names.

A few hands lowered, not wanting to repeat the names France had already said.

“Hungary, you next.”

“Austria, Switzerland, Liechtenstein, and Norway.”

America went ahead without Germany telling him to do so.

“Mattie, Peter, and Blockbrows aren’t here either!”

“Just wait a moment!” Germany snapped as he continued writing.

More hands had lowered, until two remained.

“Alright, Japan?”

“Hai. Turkey, Greece, Taiwan, Romania, and Bulgaria.”

“And one more, Lithuania?”

“Estonia and Belarus.”

“Is that all?” Germany reconfirmed.

The nations murmured for a few seconds before agreeing that that was all they were missing.

Before Germany could propose a plan to find everyone and then get the fuck outta here, the grandfather clock bells chimed. It was eleven o’clock, and everything became dark.

“Aw, not this shit again,” Prussia said with a groan.

_Chat Room - World Meeting 5/12_

_Time - 11:01 PM_

**Ludwig Beilschmidt:** Nobody move! When the lights come back on, we can go look for everyone missing.

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Dude what if we get teleported again

 **Ludwig Beilschmidt:** Then find your way back to the drawing room. If you can locate an exit, report it immediately.

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Gotcha

 **Lars V:** Did you guys use my entire stash because you all sound high as fuck.

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** How’d you sneak the weed into the meeting room

 **Lars V:** What do you mean sneak? I’m at the hotel.

 **King of Scandinavia:** what

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** What

 **Matthew Williams:** What.

 **Lars V:** The meeting starts tomorrow right?

 **Matthew Williams:** It started this morning. Did you know about the schedule change?

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** I don’t think we’re the ones who are high buddy

 **King of Scandinavia:** the reason why ned doesnt have any weed is cause he smoked it all lol

 **Lars V:** Sounds legit.

 **Ludwig Beilschmidt:** Netherlands, is there anybody else that is not at the meeting you can bring along? This is urgent.

 **Lars V:** Why? Is something wrong?

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** There’s some real creepy shit going on in here

 **Matthew Williams:** He’s not making up the teleporting thing. We were all in the meeting room and then five minutes later we all got separated. Next thing you know, Norway says there’s something coming after us.

**Lars V** _can no longer be reached_

**Matthew Williams:** There goes our only connection to the rest of the world.

 **King of Scandinavia:** guess we just gotta have faith pothead is gonna bring backup

_Time - 11:05 PM_

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Guess who was right

 **Ludwig Beilschmidt:** Just go find the drawing room.

_Time - 11:07 PM_

**^J^:** I cannot find the basement.

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Neither can I you ain’t special

 **^J^:** You do not understand, Amerika. The first time the lights went out, I was in front of the basement. I should be the one to know where it is. The basement door is supposed to be next to the stairs, da?

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** What do you mean commie bastard

 **Feliks Lucaskiewicz:** I’m in the basement right now and all I see is gross stuff. Like where did all the rooms go

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Are you telling me that we aren’t the only things that change position during the blackouts

 **Feliks Lucaskiewicz:** Yeah totally

 **^J^:** As usual, I am correct. Do not doubt me, Amerika.

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Shut it commie. What we supposed to do now that all the rooms got shuffled

 **Ludwig Beilschmidt:** Find as many people as possible and we shall discuss all matters in this group chat from now on.

_Chat Room - Awesome Touch Brothers_

_Time - 11:08 PM_

**The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** Damn this is some next level Harry Potter shit right here

 **King of Scandinavia:** where’sblockbrows when you need him

 **The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** Maybe we can summon him

 **Francis Bonnefoy:** Unless you are one of sourcil's former colonies, I doubt summoning him would work.

 **The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** I have tea packets. You got any spotted dick?

 **King of Scandinavia:** i have two moles does that count

 **The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** TMI dude

_Chat Room - Nordick Five_

_Time - 11:16 PM_

**Norgay:** I found lilbror and Fin

 **Norgay:** We’re in an office

 **King of Scandinavia:** NORGE I SAW A BIGASS WHITE THING AND IT WASNT SVE THIS TIME

 **King of Scandinavia:** ITS COMING FOR ME

 **King of Scandinavia:** WHY THE FUCK ARE ALL THE DOORS LOCKED

 **King of Scandinavia:** SHIT I LOST GILBERT

 **Berwald O.:** You scream too loud.

 **King of Scandinavia:** THANK THORS NUTSACK TELL ME WHICH ROOM YOU ARE IN

 **Berwald O.:** After being called a “bigass white thing,” I’ll have to pass.

 **King of Scandinavia:** FUCK YOU SVE

 **Tino Vaïnamoïnen:** Hard to recover from that one, Mathias.

_Time - 11:17 PM_

**Norgay:** Life just isn’t the same since Anko died

 **King of Scandinavia:** IM NOT DEAD

 **King of Scandinavia:** IM LITERALLY POUNDING ON THE DOOR THAT SAYS OFFICE NOW OPEN UP

 **Norgay:** Sometimes I can still hear his voice

**Emil Steilsson** _took a screenshot_

_Chat Room - World Meeting 5/12_

_Time - 11:20 PM_

**The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** Has anyone seen Dickmark we spawned together on the stairs but idk where he ran off to

 **Arthur Kirkland:** Spawned? SPAWNED? THIS ISN’T MINCECRAFT YOU DOLT!

 **Berwald O.:** Minecraft*

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** I heard someone go “SWEDEN IS GONNA BE A SORRY SON OF A BITCH WHEN HE FINDS OUT DENMARK TURNS INTO DEADMARK” from the other end of the hall

 **The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** Yeah, that’s him

_Time - 11:26 PM_

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** I checked the hallway and it was empty

 **Tomato Bastard:** Don’t worry mi amigos, he’s here with me. I saved him from a bigass white thing. It looked kind of like you, Alfred.

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** I don’t know whether I should be offended or not

_Time - 11:30 PM_

**Arthur Kirkland:** Bloody hell Alfred, since when did you undergo transmutation with Frosty the Snowman?!

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** I literally have no idea what you’re talking about

 **Arthur Kirkland:** Why do they sound like you if you inhaled helium instead of hamburgers?!

 **Tomato Bastard:** Oh, you met one of the bigass white things!

 **King of Scandinavia:** THERES MORE THAN ONE???????

 **Tomato Bastard:** Sí, so far I’ve already avoided three of them.

 **Tomato Bastard:** Denmark fainted.

_Time - 11:32 PM_

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Where are you blockbrows

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** I’m trying to rescue your crybaby ass

 **Arthur Kirkland:** STOP TEXTING ME IT’S SETTING OFF MY NOTIFICATIONS THEY’LL HEAR MY CELL PHONE

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Just change the settings you old geezer

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** And don’t comment on me for not using commas look at yourself

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Now which floor are you on

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Come on if you don’t respond I can’t find you

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** Who’s the one yelling “DADDY” at me because last time I remembered I’m still single

 **Tomato Bastard:** I advise you to run.

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** HOLY JESUS GOD ALMIGHTY THE FRESNO NIGHTCRAWLERS ARE REAL

 **Matthew Williams:** I can’t tell if he’s really scared or really excited.

 **Arthur Kirkland:** Probably both.

_Chat Room - Magic Gang_

_Time - 11:34 PM_

**Vlad the Prevailer:** Hello children, I have royally screwed up

 **Arthur Kirkland:** What did you do this time?

 **Vlad the Prevailer:** Before you say anything, I haven’t killed anyone yet

 **Norgay:** Yet

 **Vlad the Prevailer:** I need you guys to find me because I can’t exactly move while carrying a body


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Discoveries are made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A useless EU member = Bulgaria  
> Crouching Tiger Hidden Yao = China  
> Lien = Vietnam  
> MC Wang = Macau  
> Saucy Boy = Hong Kong

_Chat Room - 10th Floor_

_Time - 11:20 PM_

_(19 minutes after the daunting discovery of the manor)_

**Lars V** _invited_ **Sadik Adnan** _,_ **Xiao Mei** _,_ **A useless EU member** _, and_ **Natalya Arlovskaya** _into_ 10th Floor

**Lars V:** You may be wondering why I gathered you all here today.

 **Sadik Adnan:** What’s so damn important that you had to set this group chat as VIP? It’s late as hell and I don’t wanna be a part of this

 **Xiao Mei:** We’re supposed to be resting! The meeting is early and we need all the rest we can get!

 **Lars V:** The thing is, the meeting started this morning and ended hours ago.

 **Xiao Mei:** What?!

 **Sadik Adnan:** Chill out we still got 2 more days left of the meeting

 **Lars V:** I think everyone on this floor was ignored when they sent out reminders for a schedule change.

 **A useless EU member:** Can confirm. All of our letters are still in the lobby.

 **Xiao Mei:** I don’t think it was our fault for being left out. Do you know why we didn’t receive them?

 **Sadik Adnan:** *cough cough* Hotel staff smelled someone smoking weed and purposefully avoided our floor and then forgot to deliver the letters before the night was over *cough cough*

 **Xiao Mei:** I thought I was feeling a bit funny last night. Thanks for clearing things up!

 **A useless EU member:** So why didn’t you tell us that earlier?

 **Sadik Adnan:** I thought someone would notice us not showing up at the meeting and figured if it was so important they’d come get us anyway

 **A useless EU member:** I guess they don’t care about us then.

 **Lars V:** Alright, I’m sorry for low-key getting everyone high. Can I get back to the point now?

 **Sadik Adnan:** Go ahead

 **Lars V:** _“World Meeting 5/12_Time -11:01 PM. screenshot”_

 **Lars V:** I was disconnected from the chat room, but I think this is enough to give you all a gist of the situation.

 **Xiao Mei:** What in the world?

**Natalya Arlovskaya** _left_ 10th Floor

**Sadik Adnan** _invited_ **Natalya Arlovskaya** _into_ 10th Floor

**Sadik Adnan:** All of our friends are in there don’t think you can just leave em

 **Natalya Arlovskaya:** If you’ve never spent a night in a haunted mansion, have you really lived yet?

 **Lars V:** Russia’s still there.

 **Natalya Arlovskaya:** …

 **Natalya Arlovskaya:** We ride at midnight.

_Chat Room - Rice Rice Baby_

_Time - 11:35 PM_

**Honda Kiku:** It had recently occurred to me that Taiwan has been quite inactive online.

 **Crouching Tiger Hidden Yao:** Now that I think about it, she hasn’t said anything since yesterday night.

 **Lien:** You know she gets nervous easily

 **Crouching Tiger Hidden Yao:** But she’s been to world meetings before.

 **MC Wang:** Did any of you see her at all today?

 **Saucy Boy:** I thought she was with gramps during the meeting

 **Crouching Tiger Hidden Yao:** I thought she was with Japan.

 **Honda Kiku:** No, I was alone during the meeting.

 **Saucy Boy:** Taiwan was on the 10th floor

 **Crouching Tiger Hidden Yao:** And?

 **Saucy Boy:** So was pothead

 **Crouching Tiger Hidden Yao:** What does that have to do with anything?

 **Saucy Boy:** Did any of you read the world meeting group chat

_Time - 11:37 PM_

**Saucy Boy:** The other people on the 10th floor were birdman, serial killer, and stick I think

 **Saucy Boy:** Place your bets on who’s actually gonna get us out of here

 **Lien:** I’m not risking anything

 **Crouching Tiger Hidden Yao:** I bet my existence on them not even showing up.

 **Honda Kiku:** Unfortunately, I too have little faith in them.

 **Lien:** Just break a window

 **MC Wang:** It’s uncouth to destroy private property.

 **Crouching Tiger Hidden Yao:** I’ve already tried that and everything seems to be smash proof.

 **Saucy Boy:** Wow just like you

 **Crouching Tiger Hidden Yao:** That damn western influence; so disrespectful.

_Chat Room - Magic Gang_

_Time - 11:37 PM_

**Vlad the Prevailer:** I may or may not have accidentally doodled a spirit circle onto my notes and trapped my DS, Estonia, and that weird pet of his inside it

 **Norgay:** Don’t tell me you summoned a trickster spirit too

 **Vlad the Prevailer:** I summoned a trickster spirit too

 **Norgay:** Goddammit

 **Arthur Kirkland:** I’ve spent centuries trying to summon a trickster spirit, and you summoned one with a doodle?

 **Vlad the Prevailer:** I think it has to do with the fact that there’s a shit ton of magic energy in the estate

 **Norgay:** I’ll see if I can cast a locating spell to find the spirit or the exit

_Time - 11:38 PM_

**Norgay:** I’m 99% sure that little bitch is blocking me on purpose because I can’t find them or the exit

 **Arthur Kirkland:** So what’s the spirit’s name?

 **Vlad the Prevailer:** Jerry

 **Vlad the Prevailer:** He disappeared before I got his last name though

 **Norgay:** That body you got is Estonia?

 **Vlad the Prevailer:** Yep

 **Norgay:** And those bigass white things used to be one of Estonia’s pets?

 **Vlad the Prevailer:** Mhm. I believe they are called mochis

 **Arthur Kirkland:** What about the shifting of the rooms?

 **Vlad the Prevailer:** I was playing Mario Party and I think Jerry got inspired

 **Arthur Kirkland:** Any ideas on how to set everything back to normal?

 **Vlad the Prevailer:** Doing the spell backwards usually does the trick

 **Vlad the Prevailer:** Get everyone and the bigass white things into the meeting room

 **Vlad the Prevailer:** But first, tell Germany the plan

 **Vlad the Prevailer:** And don’t mention that everything was my fault

_Chat Room - World Meeting 5/12_

_Time - 11:42 PM_

**Ludwig Beilschmidt:** It’s been over half an hour and we have seventeen nations in the drawing room. There are currently five people we know of that are actively looking for an exit. Anyone who has yet to find the room, report your location and who you are with in an orderly manner.

 **Tomato Bastard:** I have most of the Nordic five with me in the office by the ballroom.

 **The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** Eyyy, I’m in the ballroom

 **Sealand is a real country:** Eyyy me too

 **Crouching Tiger Hidden Yao:** Thank you for not mentioning that I had to save both of your asses before you could even reach the ballroom. Youth these days are so ungrateful.

 **Sealand is a real country:** Ok boomer

 **Arthur Kirkland:** Learn some respect Peter, at least appreciate his efforts.

 **Sealand is a real country:** Ok boomer

 **Arthur Kirkland:** If I wasn’t hiding in a dumbwaiter, I would’ve shipped you out on the first tanker back to Britain.

 **Sealand is a real country:** Romania isn’t connected to an ocean

 **Arthur Kirkland:** I know that already, you little twat.

 **Sealand is a real country:** It was very fitting that you put Britain and dumbwaiter in the same sentence

 **Arthur Kirkland:** Do you even know what a dumbwaiter is?

 **Sealand is a real country:** Yeah it’s you. You are dumb and you dress like a waiter

 **Arthur Kirkland:** Haha, you’re hilarious.

 **Sealand is a real country:** Your face is hilarious

 **Arthur Kirkland:** You’re grounded.

 **Alfred Freedom Jones:** _“Michael_Jackson_eating_popcorn.gif”_

 **Matthew Williams:** Really, Al?

 **Crouching Tiger Hidden Yao:** Is now a good time to mention that Prussia was helping Sealand write these roasts?

 **Ludwig Beilschmidt:** I sincerely apologize for letting this disappointment out of the house.

 **The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** China why you gotta expose me like that

 **Matthew Williams:** So much for orderly manner.

**Arthur Kirkland** _kicked_ **Sealand is a real country** _and_ **The Awesomer Beilschmidt** _out of_ World Meeting 5/12

_Time - 11:46 PM_

**Norgay:** Since ⅓ of our covenant has failed in informing the rest of you about a recent discovery of the peculiarity of the manor, I suggest you all pay attention to what I am about to say

 **King of Scandinavia:** thats my best friend go get em best friend

 **Ludwig Beilschmidt:** Any information is vital. Please continue, Norway.

 **Norgay:** Romania summoned a spirit that turned the manor into a giant Mario Party board and caused Estonia’s mochi to multiply and become homicidal, and the only way we can get things back to normal is to bring everyone, including those bigass white things, into the meeting room and reverse the spell, so don’t bother trying to find an exit until then

_Time - 11:47 PM_

**Alfred Freedom Jones** : What, and I cannot stress this enough, the fuck

 **King of Scandinavia:** that story was wild from start to finish

 **Vlad the Prevailer:** I told you not to tell them it was me

 **Elizaveta H:** I should’ve frying panned you as soon as you pulled that DS out of your bag. Do you know how long Feliks and I have been walking around BY OURSELVES looking for an exit?

 **Tino Vaïnamoïnen:** I hope Eduard is alright ... I knew magic was too much for this world to handle! Lukas, why didn’t you do something?

 **Norgay:** Why is it suddenly my responsibility to take care of this shitstorm

 **Ludwig Beilschmidt:** Calm down! We shall make preparations for the next fifteen minutes. As soon as the clock strikes again, we must be ready to locate the meeting room as well as those creatures.

 **Crouching Tiger Hidden Yao:** And next time we do a headcount, do not include Taiwan, Netherlands, Turkey, Belarus, and Bulgaria. They are all at the hotel.

 **Alfred Freedom Jones** : Sweet now we actually have a chance

 **Crouching Tiger Hidden Yao:** I wouldn’t be so optimistic.

_Time - 11:49 PM_

**King of Scandinavia:** WAIT YOURE MAKING US LOOK FOR THOSE BIGASS WHITE THINGS??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone's kinda dumb for the sake of plot, but this is Hetalia; no one's actually smart


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The plan is underway. There's less texting going on, since it wouldn't really make sense considering the situation.

“Why do you have a suitcase?” Turkey asked.

Belarus didn’t answer. She strutted off to the hotel’s parking lot and got into a large government owned vehicle, presumably requested by her as soon as she heard about Russia. 

The backseat doors of the SUV opened at once, beckoning for the others to get in.

“I’m not high enough for this,” Netherlands sighed. He thought of Belgium and Luxembourg. Maybe he should’ve just stayed home like they did.

“You and me both,” Bulgaria mumbled. Taiwan appeared next to him, slightly shivering from nervousness.

“Let’s just get this over with, okay?” she said with a forced smile. “Once we get everyone out, we can all go home!”

They all got in one by one. The chauffeur hit the gas pedal as soon as they were settled and they sped off to the manor.

_Chat Room - Awesome Touch Brothers_

_Time - 11:54 PM_

**Alfred Freedom Jones** _started a new game of poker_ _with_ **The Awesomer Beilschmidt** _and_ **Tomato Bastard**

**Arthur Kirkland:** I don’t think this is what Germany meant when he said to make preparations.

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** We can’t exactly do anything else at the moment.

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Franny, are you with Germany

**Francis Bonnefoy:** Oui.

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Is he making preparations?

**Francis Bonnefoy:** Not exactly.

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** So why should we

**The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** Damn blockbrows, he got you good

**The Awesomer Beilschmidt:** Toni, it’s your turn to bet

**Arthur Kirkland** _kicked_ **The Awesomer Beilschmidt** _out of_ Awesome Touch Brothers

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Why do you keep kicking people out of group chats

**King of Scandinavia:** watch the spell not work because prussia didnt show up 

**Arthur Kirkland:** He’s in at least five other chat rooms, I’m not concerned.

_Chat Room - World Meeting 5/12_

_Time - 11:59 PM_

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** IT’S THE FINAL COUNTDOWN

**King of Scandinavia:** DUHDUH DUH DUH DUHDUHDUH DUH DUH

**Arthur Kirkland:** If we have to redo this plan again because you two failed to acknowledge the seriousness of this situation, I will break both of your legs.

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Says the one that’s actually preventing people from communicating with each other

**Ludwig Beilschmidt:** Stop this immature behavior or else we will never get out of here! It is almost time, so we have to be alert!

**Ludwig Beilschmidt:** As soon as the lights turn back on, find your way to the bottom of the stairs. It’s too difficult meeting in a certain room, even though it it safer.

**Vlad the Prevailer:** There’s four floors, but all the stairs lead to the grand staircase on the first floor. Just find the stairwell closest to you and you’ll be fine

**Vlad the Prevailer:** And if anyone finds me, help me carry Estonia. I tried my best to be useful please don’t leave me with him

The chimes of the grandfather clock was heard throughout the manor and the lights shut off.

There was no room for error. They had one hour to do this.

_Time - 12:03 AM_

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** I feel like that dude from Temple Run

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Has anyone ever tried eating those bigass white things? I mean, they’re called mochis and that’s food

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** This is the longest five minutes of my life

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Why is everyone idle I’ve only seen seven of us on at one time

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Those of you who turned off your notifications y’all missing out

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** It’s boring without Gilbert and Peter causing shit

**Arthur Kirkland:** For god’s sake, STOP SPAMMING THE GODDAMN GROUP CHAT WE HAVE MORE IMPORTANT THINGS TO WORRY ABOUT

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Geez I’m just trying to pass time with the one thing that actually works

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** It’s not like anybody’s reading what I’ve sent

**Ludwig Beilschmidt:** England is right, you are causing a major distraction to those who are reading this.

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** You guys are no fun

_Time - 12:05 AM_

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** It’s go time gang let’s get it

**Arthur Kirkland:** Less texting, more running! Get off your phone!

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** You don’t have to keep yelling at me old man

In a surprisingly short amount of time, a majority of the nations had found their way to the bottom of the grand stairs. It seemed like the plan was working.

The only problem was, they were all out in the open. Germany checked his watch. Twenty minutes had passed, yet there were no sightings of any sort of danger. He was uneasy about how long it would take for the others to arrive, and if they were able to defend themselves until then.

At the gates of the manor, the 10th floor group had just arrived. As they walked closer to the building, they realized there was something immensely off about it.

“I’ve got a bad feeling about this,” Taiwan said quietly as she hid behind the taller nations.

Belarus lead the group to the front entrance of the manor. She rang the doorbell. After half a minute of waiting, she promptly unhinged one of the doors with a swift kick.

The others could only stare at her in silence.

“Well?” She motioned for them to go in first.

Bulgaria went inside and came to a quick realization that behind the doors, it wasn’t a grandeur foyer.

It was the meeting room.

Papers were still littered around the tables, pencils and pens were everywhere, and briefcases were sitting beside chairs. It was as if everyone had got up and left in the middle of someone’s presentation.

Bulgaria led the group around the tables until they reached only other the door in the meeting room.

He tried the handle. Locked. He wondered if he could kick the door down like Belarus did.

“Don’t bother,” Belarus said.

“I didn’t do anything yet.”

She touched the door’s surface.

“Everything except for this room is under some sort of spell. I’m assuming the only reason why nobody could get out is because the only exit is the one behind an unbreakable door.”

No one had to guts to question Belarus about the existence magic.

“And based on what the ghosts are telling me, this is the work of a trickster,” she said eerily.

“Is that a bad thing?” Taiwan asked nervously.

Belarus opened her suitcase to reveal a collection of occult items.

“No.” She began drawing something on the door while a piece of chalk.

“Yo, what the fuck is she doing?” Turkey whispered to Netherlands. Netherlands shrugged and began to clean his smoking pipe.

Belarus finished drawing the sigil.

“Is there anyone who dares to keep me and big brother apart?” She produced a knife from one of the folds in her dress. “I will hurt you if you don’t let me in.”

“You recognize this little drawing?” She tapped the sigil with the tip of her knife. “I can see you.”

“Now tell me who you are and why you’re preventing me from seeing big brother.”

Apparently, Belarus didn’t get the answer she was hoping for.

She brought the knife down into the door, causing everyone to jump, except for the Netherlands, who was more focused on smoking at the moment.

"You can’t hide from me!” Belarus screeched and tore off the entire door knob. She flung the door open and ran after whatever she was talking to, knives out and guns blazing.

“Well, that was terrifying,” Bulgaria said. They walked through the door and found themselves in a private study.

The study was located at the end of a wide hallway. There was a line of broken furniture strewn across the floor, no doubt Belarus’ doing.

“Hey, I’m getting notifications!” Taiwan piped up. She showed the group. “It’s from thirty minutes ago, but they sound like they really need us.”

“Who names their group chat _Rice Rice Baby_?” Turkey asked. “And who’s the one that called me ‘birdman?’”

“Netherlands, you should be able to check the _World Meeting_ chat room.” Taiwan shifted the topic expertly to avoid having to explain the antics of her cringey family.

Netherlands opened the app. Over 100 unread messages. Either they were seriously in some deep shit, or they were bored out of their minds waiting for someone to get them out. Didn’t really matter since he wasn’t going to read all of that anyway.

_Chat Room - World Meeting 5/12_

_Time - 12:33 AM_

**Lars V:** I’m here with four other people. What’s going on?

**King of Scandinavia:** OH THANK THE GODS YOU DIDNT ABANDON US HERE

**King of Scandinavia:** WERE SAVED

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Told y'all pothead's gonna bring backup 

**Ludwig Beilschmidt:** We are all on the grand staircase. How did you get into the manor?

**Lars V:** Belarus kicked down the front door.

**Ludwig Beilschmidt:** Where is it?

**Lars V:** At the front of the manor.

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Yeah no shit 

**Lars V:** There’s a study in last door of a hallway on the first floor. Inside the study, there’s another door that leads to the meeting room. I’ll go find you guys if Belarus doesn’t reach you first.

**Ludwig Beilschmidt:** Your help is very much appreciated, Netherlands. Now we are one step closer to resolving all matters.

**Ludwig Beilschmidt:** It will be Romania’s decision on whether or not we should leave the manor without reversing the damage we’ve done to it.

**Vlad the Prevailer:** This place isn’t exactly mine, and I don’t think Estonia would appreciate being unconscious for the rest of his life

**^J^:** Nothing magic metal pipe of pain can’t fix!

**Matthew** **Williams:** Please don't. 

Germany informed everyone that help had arrived and that they shall go to the meeting room as soon as Belarus or Netherlands finds them. 

“Who’s going to bring the bigass white things?” Prussia asked. 

“Nose goes!” Denmark yelled and touched his nose. The younger nations immediately followed suit. 

“We are not going to decide using that method!” Germany scolded. “If you believe you are up to the task, then you should go.” 

No one moved. 

“I can’t believe you guys are making me do this,” America muttered as he stood up. 

“Nobody’s making you do anything, Al,” Canada said. 

America ignored him. “I will bring us victory!” he declared and raced up the stairs. 

"Al, wait! We still don't know where the- and he's gone." 

_Time - 12:38 AM_

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** It’s a shame only none of you were qualified to do the hero’s work

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Remind again why I have to do round up those bigass white things

**Matthew Williams:** Like attracts like.

**King of Scandinavia:** they needed a substantial sacrifice for their gods

**Arthur Kirkland:** You’re the only one who’s expendable.

**Crouching Tiger Hidden Yao:** They respond more positively to those of lower intelligence.

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** I came out to have a good time and I’m honestly feeling so attacked right now

**Matthew Williams:** Your fault for running off and leaving us out here like sitting ducks.

**King of Scandinavia:** istg if he brings all of those bigass white things to us while we're still waiting on knife and pothead

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** Ned told y'all the location of the meeting room it ain't that hard to find

**Matthew Williams:** Yeah, because navigating a giant manor with over thirty panicked nations is so easy. 

**Alfred Freedom Jones:** I'm not gonna screw up guys trust me


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I didn't know what the hell I was writing but here's the conclusion. There's no more texting, seeing as mostly everyone's together now.

America heard someone scream from downstairs. He rounded the corner of the hallway, retracing his steps back to the stairs. If someone was screaming, then surely those bigass white things had beat him to the first floor.

Before he could reach the stairs, something appeared in his peripheral vision. Something white.

America turned around slowly. There were six pairs of eyes on him. Huh, Spain was right. They _did_ look like him.

America was on the third floor. Everyone was waiting on the first floor. He didn’t trust his descending skills.

“This better be like the movies,” he said to himself as he leapt onto the railings.

Sliding down railings weren’t actually that scary, it’s just the balancing. America quickly looked back to see how far ahead he was.

To his horror, those things were actually keeping up. Why do stairs work so well for the spherical?

“GET TO THE FUCKING MEETING ROOM!!!” America yelled down the stairwell. His voice echoed all the way to the first floor.

Germany was on his last string of patience. America ran off before Belarus or Netherlands arrived, and then the more unpreferable of the two showed up without any intent of revealing the location of the meeting room. And now, America's bringing the party to them.

“Which way do we go?” Germany asked Belarus for the third time. She was still staring at Russia, not responding to what Germany had asked. Why did he scream when he saw her earlier? Was he not happy to see her? 

It must be the tension in the air. Once she gets rid of the spirit terrorizing him, Russia will most certainly admire her. To be treated like his savior was a dream come true!

She came to the realization that she actually had to _help_ the other shitbags get out.

“Keep going right until you see the library. Then take a left.”

She watched with cold eyes as Russia pried her hands off him and followed Germany and everyone else. This spirit was going to pay for scaring her poor brother.

If only she could go with him. But first, she had a mission to fulfill.

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE I SAID GET TO THE MEETING ROOM!”

Of course. The American has to ruin everything. Belarus turned to see America sliding down the handrail with six massive blobs following him. Well, she certainly wasn’t expecting that.

Belarus rolled her eyes. There’s always something trying to interrupt her and Russia. She stood up and equipped herself with a fistful of knives.

“Only because big brother would never marry me if I let you get killed,” she mumbled angrily to herself as she ran up the stairs towards America and the creatures.

Germany spotted Netherlands at the end of the hallway calmly smoking his pipe. As a proper leader should, he ushered in the other nations before himself as he briefly spoke with Netherlands.

Everyone piled into the meeting room, all out of breath and exhausted from running around a manor for over two hours.

“You owe us your existence, gramps,” Hong Kong said as he spotted Taiwan in the corner of the room with Bulgaria and Turkey.

Taiwan rushed over with a look of relief on her face.

“Is everyone okay? I’m so sorry I didn’t know about this earlier,” she apologized, “I had no idea the meeting was today, but I’m glad I wasn’t here to experience it!”

She pulled all the Asian nations into a group hug, which was the last thing China’s spine needed.

“I know this is very heartwarming and all, but for the spell to work, the newcomers have to leave,” England informed. China and Hong Kong both narrowed their eyes at him.

Turkey watched as England got grilled by the two and decided to chat up Japan before England got back to shooing people out of the meeting room.

“Dd you kill Estonia?!” Bulgaria screeched as he noticed Estonia slumped against Romania.

“He fainted, that’s all!” Romania said as he dropped Estonia onto the floor.

“Why am I not surprised everything was your fault,” Bulgaria said as he face palmed. “It’ll be a cool story to tell Moldova though.”

“I don’t want that kind of legacy!” Romania quickly fixed Estonia up and smoothed out his business outfit. He gave his best _ta-da_ to a disappointed Bulgaria and went over to Germany, who was trying to get everything organized.

“We have exactly fifteen minutes before the clock strikes again. What else do we need?” Germany asked Romania as soon as he got everyone to take their respective seats.

“Just America and the mochis,” Romania said. “I can deal with the re-summoning.”

Norway cleared his throat and pointed at the door.

“Looks like we don’t have to do any of that.”

Standing at the study-meeting room door was Belarus with a protesting America slung over her shoulder and six unmoving blobs behind her. In her left hand she was holding a floating leash.

England, Norway, and Romania could see what she had trapped and got to work with redrawing the summoning circle on Romania’s notes.

“You’re welcome,” she spat and tossed America at the first person she saw, who happened to be Prussia. Then she dragged the mochis next to the still-unconscious Estonia, treating them like weightless beanbags.

She passed the leash over to Romania with a look of disgust and walked over to Russia.

“You better be thankful you have such a capable sister,” she said. “After this is over, I’m expecting you to say yes to my proposal.”

Russia turned white as a sheet. He nodded quickly out of fear.

“You five need to wait outside,” England said to the 10th floor group, which effectively gave Russia a chance to steady his heartbeat as Belarus reluctantly left his side.

“Somebody please save me from her,” he whispered to the other Eastern European nations. They were too terrified to answer. They knew better than to take a side when it comes to Belarus and Russia.

“Now if everyone could stay calm,” Romania instructed. He tore the summoning circle drawing from his notebook and took out the DS from his briefcase.

Norway and England took their seats. Romania tucked the sheet of paper under Estonia and his mochis. Then he placed his DS and told the spirit to stand in the circle.

He recited the incantation backwards, as soon as he finished the last verse, the room enclosed in darkness.

Within five seconds, the lights were back on. Estonia woke up, there was only one mochi (now the size of a small soccer ball), and the leash no longer held the spirit.

There was a moment of silence as everyone looked to their neighbors, making sure nothing had changed.

“It’s finished!” Romania said happily. He was half-expecting it to not work, but he was glad it did.

Everyone was too exhausted to celebrate. They were just relieved they no longer had to keep running around in the maze of a manor with things chasing after them.

“We’re still meeting here tomorrow, right?” Spain asked.

Everyone knew the answer to that. Even Germany, who hardly made decisions on a whim.

“NO!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's a wrap. Honestly, I had no idea where I was going with this, since I was mostly writing with the intent of finishing it before school starts again. Hope you liked it!


End file.
